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20
NOV
2012

Valuing Relationships

I am sorry for the delayed November Ezine, but Haseeb and I were away to celebrate our Silver Jubilee Wedding Anniversary to a remote resort in Langkawi Malaysia, to rekindle our relationship.

We spend all our life, fulfilling our professional commitments and put aside what is most important to us – our personal allegiances. Time passes so quickly and before we know it we are governed by the schedules of our work which makes us tense and we show it to the people we love. It is so unfair that we are polite and courteous to our colleagues, clients and bosses, who amount to marginally less in the overall life and are abrupt, rude and angry to the people we love!

We need to realize that a spouse/partner is the foundation, which is keeping us from crumbling to the pressures around us; but that also means that the entire burden is resting on that fragile supporting structure.  Any time it creaks, our first reaction is anger and reprisal. Is that not so? Whenever we hear any complaint, we lash out, pointing out at the insensitivities on the part of our partner at not realizing the burden on us. We are oblivious to the strains they carry due to our baggage.

Work, business, children, family obligations etc take most of our time in life, specially during the initial few years of our life. We are juggling with several roles in life, always short of time to fully meet the deadlines. At that stage, we feel time is dragging, but slowly all those demands on our life become fewer, and we look back in life to see how much ground we have covered. Children leave the nest, work becomes repetitively easy, friends have moved on. At that point in time, we have the luxury to spend quality time with our second other, but we feel too much water has run under the bridge and we have nothing more to talk about to your companion. It is like two strangers residing under the same roof.

Like all projects in life, this relationship needs to be planned, nurtured and empowered. If this is not done in time, the result is remains/ruins of what was a beautiful structure waylaid by carelessness and maintenance.

If you are still unsure ask yourself a few questions:

  • When was the last time you went out with your spouse/partner on a romantic dinner?
  • When was the last time you gave flowers to him/her without it being a birthday or anniversary?
  • When did you last go to a honeymoon resort for a holiday?
  • When did you last watch a romantic movie in the theatre holding hands?
  • When was the last time you had a giggling fit together?
  • How have you visualized your old age, alone or with someone?

 

There is still time to awaken the love you have inside. Make time for the person you most care about.

Zaufyshan was educated in the area of Human Development & Behavioral Psychology, she achieved her distinction in MSc in 1986. A behavioural psychologist with extensive senior management experience in both the public and private health sectors, helps her to combines her practical knowledge of psychology and management to develop and present programs which meet the changing needs of business. She had the opportunity of experiencing education in a diverse culture in Singapore, where she studied innovative method of “Imparting Education Without Stress” at all levels of education. She was also involved with psychological counseling for teenagers as well as the faculties of reputable institutions. This helps her develop her inter-personal skills as well as work on her empathetical abilities. She feel pride in changing perspectives of the new generation.
  1. Intek World Reply

    We appreciate your comments. Please keep contributing towards our motivational blog

  2. Sultana Mahmud Reply

    Lovely article

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