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Self Development
~ Basic Human Need Principles
for Work And Home Life Happiness
~
Lyndsay Swinton
Applying basic human need
principles to your work and home life can increase your happiness. How?
Well, I bet you don't take your car to the mechanic when the petrol warning
light comes on, so why look for complicated solutions when your own warning
lights come on?
Like a car, there are all sorts
of early warning indicators, which alert you to take remedial action - e.g.
tiredness, anxiety, tearfulness, lethargy, no concentration etc. Some you
will be familiar with and know how to fix them, but some may require you to
check the manual, and cause a little anxiety and dread in the process. If
unfamiliar warning lights are flashing in your life, read on..
Apparently, if you chuck a frog into a pan of boiling water, it will hop
straight out again. But if you put him in cold water and slowly heat it up,
he will sit there until well and truly poached.
Chances are your home and work life has changed gradually over time, and
problems have snuck up on you without you noticing. Being made redundant, a
new baby or the death of a spouse are like being chucked into boiling water
- it's obvious to you and all around you what's causing the pain. But if the
cause is something less clear or quite subtle, it's easy to miss. In this
case, the best first step is to do a quick check against the basic human
need principles outlined in the article, and see where the problem may be
coming from.
Let's look at each of the basic needs in turn;
1. The need to give and receive attention - "No Man Is An Island"
We've all met them (or been one yourself!) - the person who just won't shut
up when you're trying to work. Any attention, positive or negative gets
sucked up and you're left drained and resentful. This person needs a
healthy, regular dose of quality attention from friends, family, work-mates
and social groups.
Sometimes gaps in social skills compounds this problem, as the person
doesn't get positive attention. But as with most things, with a bit of
effort and risk taking, social skills can be improved, and attention needs
met.
2. Taking heed of the mind and body connection
It's so obvious, but so many people over-look the mind body connection. Do
you really think you will be on form if you regularly skip breakfast, guzzle
caffeine and stay up late with a bottle of wine? No athlete follows this
routine, so why should you? Getting the right amount of sleep, food,
exercise and relaxation takes care of your mind and body connection.
3. The need for purpose, goals and meaning - "The devil will make work
for idle hands to do"
To be human is to be a problem solver. When we don't have real problems to
solve, we'll make up fantasy ones, just to meet this need. If your
teenager's response to your problem is a dismissive "get a life", then maybe
it's time to find bigger and better problems to solve.
4. A sense of community and making a contribution
Tying in with the need for meaning, is the need to be part of something
bigger than oneself. This need is often met through religion, a club,
charity or community work. This gives a person a reason for being, over and
above their own personal needs.
Company community involvement is a motivator if done properly. The Body Shop
company policy is to allow staff time off work to get involved in local
projects.
5. The need for challenge and creativity
Getting the grey matter working hard does wonders for your mental health.
Learning something new, expanding your horizons or improving existing skills
gives a sense of progress and achievement. That's why it's important to have
a
Personal Development Plan. Or as Steven Covey puts it - you need to
"sharpen the saw".
6. The need for intimacy
Tying in with the need for attention, is the need to share your personal
hopes, dreams and ambitions with someone who is "on your level". A good
manager will create an environment of trust such that a person can express
their future desires and support them in moving in that direction.
7. The need to feel a sense of control
Being bound in a straightjacket may seem like the epitome of loss of
control. But even then, you can still control your reaction and action in
this situation. To meet the need for a sense of control, you need at least
one area of your work or home life that's yours and yours alone. A little
responsibility, no matter age or situation is healthy.
8. The need for a sense of status
Recognition and status go hand in hand. If you are valued and recognised as
a manager, a parent, an expert or whatever, you will meet your need for a
sense of status.
Outward displays of status, such as a flashy car or the latest gadget, are
an attempt to meet this need - the need to be recognised for earning a big
salary or being cutting edge. If this need is over-powering, (there's always
one boring bragger in your life), you can bet at least one other need is not
being met. Helping them meet that missing need will diminish the need to
tell all and sundry about their latest acquisition or achievement.
9. The need for a sense of safety and security
We need to feel our environment is basically secure and reasonably
predictable. Financial security, physical safety and health plus fulfilment
of all the other needs contribute to the completion of this need. Threats of
redundancy or down-sizing, overly competitive colleagues and an unpleasant
working environment all make this need harder to meet.
If progress through life has gone a bit awry, for your or a friend, check if
the basic human need principles are being met. Remember it's usually lack of
petrol that stops the engine from going forward and not something more
complicated or sinister. |