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Articles
Cross
Cultural Awareness
Performance Appraisals
Project Management
Interpersonal Skills
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Dear Friends
During my thesis in Development Psychology, there was a question, where
people had to answer, “What would make them
happy?” and about 74% replied that their life would be much
happier if they had more money.
 Let
me take you to the wonderful world called
“The Billionaire’s club”. Several mansions, vacation homes,
private jets, lavish parties, flowing champagne and caviar, ever-
increasing social circle - Lifestyle of the rich and famous!! You would
think they are the happiest in the world - Think again !!!!
The entire wealth cannot fill the void they feel within. They cannot
trust people as they fear, that these friends are after their money. The
only people they can have a decent heart to heart conversation are their
therapists, who are sworn confidentiality as professional ethics. Even
within the crowd these pseudo-happy people feel lonely. Wealth, instead
of giving them peace, causes them greater anxiety of losing it.
While we fantasize about being wealthy, the excuses we make from our
families of not spending enough time with them is, that we are toiling
towards making our family’s and our future generations comfortable. But
if we provide abundant wealth we are ruining the future of our children.
I want to provide for my children but I don’t want to tarnish their
lives with too much affluence
We have live instances where riches have wrecked lives. Examples of
lavish households, Christina and Alexander Onassis, both heirs to
Onassis empire died with the poison of an affluent lifestyle. We await
the fall of the last heir Athina, who is already going through therapy,
to cope with her stressful life.
 Other
examples of fame fortune are Princess Diana, Paris Hilton, Lindsay Lohan,
John Belushi, Anna Nicole etc etc. The list goes on….. The slide starts
from drugs, alcoholism and sometimes suicide. It saddens my heart to see
the list of people who had it all, yet lived a life of desolation and
ended up taking their own lives.
 Bill
Gates might be the richest guy , but his kids can not enjoy their
freedom, due to death threats. Michael Jackson makes his kids wear masks
so that no-one can see their faces. Imagine what personalities, these
kids will have when they grow up.
While counseling a concerned father from the Billionaires Club, who
wanted to train his child for the leadership of his empire in the
future; I advised him to take away his 17 year old son’s sports car and
reduce his pocket money. Let him earn his rewards. In the Kabbalah
Script; any rewards earned without the necessary hardship are called
Bread of Shame and innately we feel we don’t deserve it.
It is the struggle to stay afloat the keeps life interesting. Having
everything is not enough. If life loses its struggle, what is there to
live for? The lack of money is more motivating. Having that fear of
destitution gets you out of bed and not the alarm clock.
 We
dream of winning a lottery and It shocks people when Haseeb says that it
is a misfortune for a 25 year old to win a million dollars in lottery!!!
We have had friends who won it and blew it within 5 years. Now rusted
from the lack of use of their skills, are finding it difficult to pick
up the threads of their life.
A lot of our readers while viewing the contents might think that it is a
portrayal of “Grapes are sour!!!” but much as I struggle to earn a
livelihood, I am counting my blessings each and every day, for my lovely
three kids, a loving husband and a lifestyle which so self-gratifying.
What else would I want? In between my professional endeavours, I find
time for my gardening, and my television show, but if I had the leisure
of the entire life ahead of me, these activities would become mundane
and boring.
I am thankful for all the fortunes and misfortunes that have been placed
in my life, as they have made my character as it is today and will
continue to mould me for the better till the day I leave this world.
Always look forward to your
suggestions / feedback
which helps the Intek team to continually improve this Ezine.
Zaufyshan Haseeb
and The Intek Family
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Cross Cultural Awareness
Global Non-Verbal Signals - Central and South America
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Brazil
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 When conversing,
good eye contact is important. To not do so is considered impolite.
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In a marketplace,
if a vendor holds his hand out, fingers extended and flips the thumb
back and forth it merely means, 'There isn't any left; I don't have
any more.'
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A good, warm
handshake is the traditional greeting in Brazil. However, because
the Brazilians show affection easily, among add male friends the
abraco (Portuguese spelling), or embrace, will be added.
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People in Brazil
will also shake hands when arriving and departing. There may also be
a touching of the forearm or elbow, and often a pat on the back.
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If you are
conducting business, be certain to bring a plentiful supply of
business cards because these are always exchanged. Also, during
business meetings expect to be served (often) small cups of very
strong coffee.
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Since this is
more of a touching society, people stand close together when
conversing or when standing in lines.
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To add emphasis
to a statement, a Brazilian may snap the fingers while whipping the
hand down own and out.
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To express
appreciation, a Brazilian may appear to pinch his earlobe between
thumb and forefinger. For example, if you've enjoyed a meal this
gesture may be used. Among Brazilians, to dramatize it even further,
they will reach behind the head and grasp the opposite earlobe.
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Performance Appraisals
360O Evaluation: Everything You Ever Wanted to Know,
But Were Afraid to Ask
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 I assume that everyone here knows what 360 degree evaluation is, or you
wouldn't be here: but just in case, let me briefly say that about every
decade or so, a management innovation comes along that generates great
enthusiasm in organizations-and 360 degree feedback has been perhaps the
most notable management innovation of the 1990s. The goal of 360 degree
feedback is to increase employees' self-awareness so that they can
improve their work performance, and this is accomplished by seeking
feedback from all or most of the constituencies with which an employee
has contact, particularly co-workers and customers (Waldman and Atwater
ix).
I'm sure you're all at least vaguely familiar with Douglas Adams, the
author of the famous Hitchhiker's Guide...this quote from his 1987 book,
Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency, gives us a great analogy to
help understand why 360 degree evaluation can be so important in the
modern workplace:
"[Horses] have always understood a great deal more than they let on. It
is difficult to be sat on every day by some creature without forming an
opinion of them. On the other hand, it is perfectly possible to sit all
day, every day, on top of another creature, and not have the slightest
thought about them whatsoever." (Ward 3)
This is really the rationale for 360-degree performance review in a
nutshell!
Centuries ago, Sir Frances Bacon noted that knowledge is power... And
true knowledge of ourselves puts us in the powerful position of at least
being aware of behaviors we may have, which prevent us from being the
successful persons we want to be. Because most people avoid
confrontation and find it difficult to tell unpleasant truths to
others--especially those they like--we seldom have an ...
click here to read more
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Project Management
A Stress Reduction Method: Handling Uncertainty
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 Challenging. Stimulating. Fast moving. These are some of the words we
commonly use to describe our experience of project management.
Unfortunately, we also use these words. Chaotic. Stressful.
Anxiety-inducing.
Perhaps, by cultivating and concentrating on the descriptions from the
first list we can minimize the number of times we use the words on the
second list to describe our process.
If you actually apply this PM stuff well, it takes the stress out of
project work.�
Project management as a stress management technique? Recently, I had
workshop participants from two very different PM seminars, which dealt
with opposite ends of the PM spectrum, express this theory to me,
surprising us all. I had never acknowledged project management (PM) as a
stress management technique and decided to give it some thought. It
became clear to me that by applying the basic principles of Project
Management, the anxiety, chaos, blaming, anger, etc. that creates stress
during the life of a project, can certainly be reduced, if not
eliminated.
To use PM techniques as a stress reduction method we will identify some
of the typical causes of stress in projects. We will then examine ......
click here to read more
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Interpersonal Skills
Conflict Styles and their Consequences
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 Conflict is often best understood
by examining the consequences of various behaviors at moments in time. These
behaviors are usefully categorized according to conflict styles. Each style
is a way to meet one's needs in a dispute but may impact other people in
different ways.
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Competing is a
style in which one's own needs are advocated over the needs of others.
It relies on an aggressive style of communication, low regard for future
relationships, and the exercise of coercive power. Those using a
competitive style tend to seek control over a discussion, in both
substance and ground rules. They fear that loss of such control will
result in solutions that fail to meet their needs. Competing tends to
result in responses that increase the level of threat.
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Accommodating,
also known as smoothing, is the opposite of competing. Persons using
this style yield their needs to those of others, trying to be
diplomatic. They tend to allow the needs of the group to overwhelm their
own, which may not ever be stated, as preserving the relationship is
seen as most important.
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Avoiding is a
common response to the negative perception of conflict. "Perhaps if we
don't bring it up, it will blow over," we say to ourselves. But,
generally, all that happens is that feelings get pent up, views go
unexpressed, and the conflict festers until it becomes too big to
ignore. Like a cancer that may well have been cured if treated early,
the conflict grows and spreads until it kills the relationship. Because
needs and concerns go unexpressed, people are often confused, wondering
what went wrong in a relationship.
-
Compromising ...
click here to read more
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